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Ariel & Gobuss
| Chapter 23 - "Ice & Fire" |
Beta Reader: PurpleSonata
Thank you girls!
23. Ice & Fire.
It's in your eyes, what's on your mind
I fear your smile and the promise inside
It's in your eyes, what's on your mind
There is no mercy, just anger I find*
Harry was sitting on a chair in the Common Room, staring into the fire. There were still several students in the corners of the room who didn't have classes now. Some first-years were playing Wizard's Chess, some people were doing homework, and at the other end of the room there was a pair of fifth years, constantly kissing and snogging. From time to time, some parts of their hot confessions reached Harry's ears:
''You are the only one, baby. I love you so much that I can't express it. I'd give you my heart on a silver platter.''
''I love you too, Teddy Bear. Madly! I can't live without you, I'd die if... ''
Harry grimaced, the nausea rising in his stomach. It was so... mawkish and luscious that he had the impression as if he'd been forced to eat pounds of sweetest toffees from Honeydukes. With disgust, he turned away from them and stared at the crackling flames again.
He tried to calmly analyze the situation which had happened in the classroom. Anger was still seething in him, but not with such force as it had been just an hour ago, when the wrath had almost torn him to pieces. Snape shouldn't have done it! Absolutely not! Not only had he treated him like no one, he'd also made it look like Harry'd done something to him! And he had worked so hard on that essay; he'd spent so much time on it... Had Snape really had to
treat him that way? Harry didn't expect him to appreciate his efforts, but to do what he'd done... Harry shook his head, as the level of his anger started to rise again. He didn't think that it could affect him so. A cup of bitterness had overflowed with the sudden and unexpected attack on Hermione. How could Snape behave like that? How could he tell her those terrible words? Harry'd just had to defend her! He'd had to take vengeance! He'd had to...
Harry bit his lip. He felt it. Something strange, something as powerful as anger burning in him, but he couldn't define it. He knew he'd felt it before, too. This thing had whispered to him, telling him to fight, to tempt, to balance on the verge, to throw himself forward in an attempt to cross the line or even touch it. To provoke Snape...
At the same moment he heard the footsteps approaching. When the portrait was pushed, the room was instantly filled with loud noise and excited voices. He turned his head and saw a wave of Gryffindors pouring into the room.
''Mate!'' Ron's voice forced its way through a crowd. ''You gave him hell! Finally you've put him in his place!''
Neville's head appeared behind him.
''It was amazing, Harry. I would have never dared...''
''The whole school is already gossiping about it,'' Ron grinned. ''You've become a hero!''
Hermione ran out from behind the redhead.
''Oh, Harry!'' she cried and threw herself on his neck. ''Thanks, but it was so... so... '' her voice broke. ''So stupid!'' she pulled away and looked at him with tears of gratitude in her eyes. ''Don't do that again!''
Harry, too stunned to say anything, nodded and looked at the smiling faces surrounding him. He saw Seamus among them - he didn't smile, but he was certainly not looking at him with such hatred in his eyes as before. It was even possible to see a small spark of... recognition there.
''It was great, but I really wouldn't want to be in your place right now,'' Ron continued, looking at his friend with concern. ''If you go to him today for the detention, then you won't come out alive.''
''Ron!'' Hermione raised her voice. ''Stop scaring him! Snape is a teacher, he can't hurt Harry.''
'I'm not sure, Hermione...' Harry thought.
''If I were you, I would find some excuse.''
It was a very tempting offer, but Harry knew that he couldn't avoid this detention. And an attempt to escape could make things even worse...
''No, I have to go, otherwise Snape’ll be even more mad,'' he said. He smiled reassuringly, but more so to calm himself than his friends.
''In that case we will keep our fingers crossed for you,'' said Neville. ''Don't worry, Harry. You can do it.''
''Uhm," he grunted in response, not so sure.
The afternoon passed quickly. Why is it that always when you are waiting for something, time is dragging worse than Flobberworms, and when something unpleasant is coming, it's rushing like a herd of centaurs on the hunt?
In the scheduled time beforehand, Harry helped Ginny to get out of the Common Room by chatting with Ron and showing him the latest cards of Chudley Cannon’s players. He couldn't stand Hermione's compassionate glances and the occasional pats on the back from random Gryffindors who passed nearby, trying to give him encouragement.
Finally it was time to go. Hermione wished him luck, Ron asked if he could keep his broom in case Harry wouldn't come back (for which Hermione hit him with a book), Neville smiled hesitantly, several people waved goodbye to him (why did he have the impression that they looked at him as though they really expected him not to come back?), and then took a deep breath and headed for the dungeons.
When he was walking down the endless stairs, however, he didn't feel terror. He was upset, and fear seemed to devour his stomach from the inside, but it was all pushed to the background by anger, which was still pulsing in him, making him unable to think about anything else. With each step he told himself that he'd done nothing wrong, and that he wouldn't let Snape trash him. He was right, and whatever happened, he would defend himself!
He paused before entering the office, and took several deep breaths, gathering up his courage. He was strangely excited. The gambler who'd put everything on one card must feel this way - and now he would finally find out whether he’d won or not...
He touched the door and it opened with a quiet squeak. He sighed again, clenched his fists and quickly went through the room, and then to the chamber of the Potions Master. Harry crossed the threshold and realized that Snape was nowhere in the lounge. It was strange. He always waited for him there. Harry stopped, looking around.
The door creaked behind him quietly, closing, breaking the prevailing silence. Harry felt a cold breeze and the odd sensation of danger. With a corner of his eye he saw a movement behind him, but before he could turn around, strong hands grabbed him by the robe and threw him to the wall. He hit his back against it, losing his breath for a moment, but immediately Severus was beside him. Harry's heart pounded violently, the razor-sharp, burning with rage gaze cut through the space separating them and went straight to his eyes. Harry widened his in surprise.
''Who do you think you are, Potter!?'' Severus hissed in a voice colder than the breath of a Dementor. His face was mere millimeters from Harry's, flaming pupils shooting sparks, venom flowing from his mouth. ''Did you want to play a hero in front of them, at my lesson?!'' Snape's warm, rapid breathing was touching Harry's face, stirring up fire in him. The wall which the man pressed him into was hard and cold, almost as much as the pressing body.
''How dare you oppose me! How dare you challenge my authority! I should severely punish you for your insolence, arrogance and ...''
''No!'' Harry shouted, as he was finally able to find his breath and voice, though the latter trembled. ''I wouldn't have done it if you had behaved yourself normally! You started it! I was just defending Hermione. She is my friend and I couldn't let you treat her like that! I couldn't take how you humiliated my friends!''
Snape's eyes flashed with venomous glow. Harry stopped breathing, feeling something in his stomach freeze.
''I will no longer tolerate your insolence, Potter! You will never ridicule me in front of my students again!''
''You can't take your bad mood out on them!'' Harry retorted. He felt rage, rage like a flaming molten iron, and fiery lava forming inside him, growing with every one of Snape's word. ''How could you say something like that to Hermione? It was vicious!''
The man's hand shot up and grabbed his shirt at the neck, almost choking him, tugging and pulling him upward.
''I am vicious, Potter!'' the man said through clenched teeth, squeezing Harry with a crushing force. ''Have you forgotten who you are dealing with or do I have to remind you about that?''
Harry felt a strange explosion in his interior. Something grew out of his anger, but it was much too pleasant.
''Sometimes you might pay attention whom you are vicious to,'' he bit off defiantly. ''Those are my friends!''
''And do you think I care?'' Severus snorted. ''Do you think I will be ''nice'' to them just because they are your ''dear friends''!? Don't make me laugh. For me, they are fools just like the rest - I will treat them as I like, and you do not have the right to question my decisions, boy!''
Harry winced, feeling anger take over him completely and at the same time he had the desire to do so, wanting to free what was growing inside him.
''In that case you have to accept that I will stand up for them every time you want to trash them!'' he countered with a trembling, frustrated voice. He saw Snape's eyes suddenly narrow and flash with icy glitter.
''I don't have to anything, Potter! But it seems that you have to learn how to obey!'' Severus almost spat out those words in his face, then jerked him violently and threw him across the room. Harry fell into a chair, hitting his knees and elbows painfully. For a moment he lost his breath again. He turned and saw Severus approaching him, looking at him like a wild, enraged beast. Harry quickly jumped to his feet and began to retreat. He could hear the terrified beating of his heart; feel his muscles warm with adrenaline…and demonic anger.
''I've had enough!'' he shouted, his voice breaking. Strange, but why did he want to say just the opposite? ''You cannot treat me this way! Do you think you can do with me whatever you like, and I'll let you?'' he saw Snape lift one eyebrow in a gesture of amusement and realized that after all that had happened, it was illogical, so he quickly corrected himself. ''I mean ... '' he stammered. ''Maybe it was like that before, but from now on it's going to all change! You will not treat me like dirt any more! That's enough!''
Snape stopped suddenly, looking at Harry with a mixture of disdain and curiosity. As one would look at the struggling insect that is trying to get away from the cobweb surrounding it. Harry hesitated. Severus' eyes filled him with anxiety.
''And how will you forbid me it, Potter?'' he hissed in a menacing, dark whisper. ''How will you forbid me to use my property the way I want to?''
Harry felt blood rush to his head. He blinked a few times, unable to believe what he'd just heard.
A faint shadow of derisive smile ran through Severus' face.
He had to get a grip quickly. He wouldn't let him do that to him again!
''I'm not... '' he began, but the man interrupted him:
''You will obey me, Potter, otherwise you will get a severe punishment,'' he hissed, and Harry felt fury kindle up and grow within him, mingling with a sting of almost painful, disturbing... pleasure.
He clenched his fists. He couldn't stop the madness in which he'd fallen, which he couldn't fight, which drove him further and further over the cliff from where he could drown at any moment right into the raging sea. He couldn't refrain from making it even more raging, watching the white foam of anger rise into the air, almost reaching his feet, trying to draw him into the abyss.
''I don't care!'' he growled. ''You can do whatever you want to me, but you can't attack my friends! You can't use your power to oppress those weaker than you! The next time you have a bad mood, take it out on me, not them!'' Harry stopped suddenly, seeing Snape pull out his wand. He froze in horror.
''You asked for it,'' Snape hissed and waved his wand. ''Flagello!''
Harry felt a painful lash on his cheek, as if someone had lashed him with a whip. Sparking bursts appeared before his eyes, and blood flowed over the skin. For a few moments the air disappeared from his lungs. He pressed his hand to his cheek and looked at Snape with total surprise.
''Does it hurt? The next time you'll feel it all over your body!'' Severus drawled. ''I will not have some brat telling me how to teach and treat my students!''
Harry's eyes widened. This time the blow was stronger and more painful, because it cut not his skin, but something that was much deeper. It went to his heart.
''Some brat?'' he whispered. ''I'm just some brat to you?'' he realized that his voice was trembling, but he didn't care. He forgot about the damaged skin, forgot about everything. Anger was burning in him like a wet torch, hissing and scattering flaming sparks. ''After all this... I am for you only... 'some brat'?''
Severus let out something between a snort and sigh.
''Stop dramatizing Potter.''
Harry felt scorching, raging fury grow even more, just waiting for something that would light a fuse and let it explode. He turned abruptly from Severus and clenched his trembling fists. He could feel the heat under his eyelids, and the sound of crackling flames in his ears. He wanted to say something, to deny it, but he was unable to. He could only stand there and hate Snape. Hate him so much that he could barely breathe.
Then he heard steps behind him. The sound of rustling robes surrounding him. He shivered when he felt a sudden puff of warm air on his neck.
''Stop struggling, because you will only hurt yourself,’’ Severus whispered softly, his lips almost touching his ear. Harry felt goose bumps on his arms. ''Stop fighting me. You know you won't win.'' His cock twitched violently, and Harry groaned. He felt that feeling coming back to life. His heart sank for a moment when Snape's arms dressed in black appeared from behind his back, and long fingers began to unbutton his pants. ''Stop defending, and running away... I'll tell you the truth, Potter,'' the man whispered darkly, slowly opening the zipper. ''You want it. You love to provoke me so I can break you,'' Snape slipped his pants from his waist and let them fall to his knees. Harry unconsciously stepped back, pressing to the cool body behind him. ''You love it when I do this. When I call you to order, when I break your resistance, when I punish you,'' the man continued, a pale hand with slender fingers slipped under his boxers. Harry was hard. He was aware of this. The rough voice, the source of which was just millimeters from his ear, gave a quiet snort when a cold hand touched his rigid erection. ''You love to feel that way, Potter. Dirty and humiliated. Broken and dominated. And I know you hate the part of yourself that likes it, but you can't stop,'' Harry groaned, and his legs buckled under him when Snape's fingers brushed against his cock again. One of Severus' hands moved back and touched his buttocks, parting them slightly with his fingers. ''You love... '' the voice became hoarse, ''to squirm at my feet.''
There was a fire burst and the fuse was lit! Harry was falling to the bottomless abyss from which there was no way back.
''And that's why you desire me so much,'' Snape's voice was so quiet and wheezing that Harry had the impression it was resounding right in his head. ''Because no one else can give you this. No one else can make you feel like that,'' Harry whimpered when he realized the rage that had been burning in him came from an entirely different feeling; A feeling which was now storming inside him with frantic force, waiting for one touch, one word to emerge on the surface and to take over him. ''And that is why that Potion pointed you toward me, Potter.''
The hand clenched on his cock convulsively, and Harry moaned, feeling heat, anger, joy, bitterness, hatred and pleasure. All those feelings mixed together, creating an unstoppable flood that in one single, rapid burst spread over his whole body, making it shake, lighting everything with sudden understanding, but what emerged from the darkness was just too terrifying to deal with...
Finger on the other hand began to slowly draw circles around his entrance, teasing it. Harry leaned his head back, mouth half-opened, gasping for air.
''You can get what you want,'' Snape said quietly, moving his nail on the sensitive input. Harry jerked and moaned. ''It's very simple, Potter, just one magic word. The word that will make you moan and beg for more, the word that will grind your senses to dust, that will lead you to madness. One word, one spell; will you throw it? Would you like to see… how it works?''
There was an explosion. The flaming fireball exploded. Hatred became a fleeting memory, the anger evaporated... desire was the only thing left. The brutal, impersonal, aggressive lust took over him. This feeling uttered that one magic word:
''What are you asking for?'' Severus asked softly, moving his nail around the hole again.
''Please, enter me,'' Harry groaned, pushing his hips back. Wishing to feel it, to feel him... inside...
And then Severus' long, slender finger slipped into him. At the same time the other man's hand stroked his hot cock. Harry whined, trapped between two such intense feelings. Snape's cold hand moved over his penis, painfully pulling the foreskin, while his finger slipped out and inside of him again. The boy jerked his hips, and an anguished moan escaped his lips.
''And now, my dear Mr. Potter... '' a hot whisper close to his ear made Harry's hips twitch again ''...I'll explain to you a few things.''
Severus' hands stopped. Harry muttered impatiently and shifted uncomfortably. He wanted his touch, his coolness which subdued the fire that burned inside him a little, subdued that ardent painful feeling of arousal in his burning loins. Although no – it definitely did not subdue, but rather inflamed it even more.
''If the usual methods of teaching don't work for you, Potter, then we'll try other ones. You must answer either yes or no. For every right answer you will get the reward. For every wrong one, well, let's just say that you won't have the chance to improve. Do you understand?''
What did he say? Harry only wanted to feel him.
He nodded, wanting Severus to finally stop teasing him and begin to move his hand. He could feel his cock pulsating, trapped in the grip of Snape's fingers.
''Please... '' he murmured, moving his hips to give Severus a sign to continue.
''You ask?!'' Snape's voice cut through the air like a whip. ''You can't ask for anything. I give the orders here, Potter. And I'll do whatever I want to do with you, and you have no right to protest. Is that clear?''
Man's hand squeezed his cock so tightly that Harry whimpered and nodded quickly.
''You will never challenge my authority in the classroom again,'' said Snape.
Harry didn't know whether it was a question, an order or a simple statement. The only thing he could hear was a threat in the man's voice, a dangerous note that made him shudder.
''No,'' he whispered softly. Snape's hand moved over his cock, a finger violently hit his prostate. Harry moaned, feeling sparks under his eyelids and explosion in his lower abdomen.
Oh, it was so great... He wanted more!
''You will never oppose me again,'' Severus' hot breath enveloped his neck, causing Harry’s body to cover with goose bumps.
''No,'' he said. Snape awarded him with another pull and hit his prostate again.
More, more, more!
''You will always obey me,'' the voice was sharp, imperative.
''Yes,'' he said, and almost at the same time he groaned hoarsely when Severus' hands rewarded him for another good answer.
''You will do what I say, without questions and without hesitation.''
The legs buckled under him when Snape's fingers pulled the top of his erection.
''You will not question my decisions.''
Another explosion made Harry almost unable to stay on his feet.
''For every act of disobedience you will get punishment. Is that clear?''
The piercing pain of pleasure.
He just wanted more! More! He’d do anything, say anything, just to get more! He felt his body tremble, and his heart beat so violently that it was almost scary.
He was burning.
''Perfect,'' he heard a menacing, full of satisfaction whisper, and at the same time the hands disappeared.
Harry opened his eyes, but didn't have time to open his mouth because Snape grabbed him by the arm and then threw him to the armchair again. He hit his forehead on the railing and the pain dazed him for a moment. Instinctively, he leaned his hands on the seat so to get up as soon as possible, regaining control over the situation, but he didn't manage to do it. He felt pressure on his hips and fingers in his hair. His head was pressed into the seat. He groaned and turned to draw breath, and at the same moment he heard Snape mutter the words of a spell.
And then everything around had ceased to exist, because Severus was already in him, and Harry felt hot, hard erection within him, encroaching brutally on his unprepared entrance. He felt something slippery which soothed the burning a little, but a muffled cry escaped his throat. The cry, however, wasn't a cry of pain. All his muscles cramped immediately, nails dug into the seat upholstery, and he felt a painful eruption of pleasure in his stomach.
Merlin, he had missed it so damn much. It felt like decades had passed since he last experienced such euphoria.
Snape, however, didn't stop, didn't stop to let Harry's body get used to it. He was entering in and out in an insane, unbridled fury, as if to punish him, to tear him to pieces. Harry felt the pain, but it was pushed aside by a completely different feeling which was increasing with every thrust, every burst of pleasure, enveloping his body and mind, leading to the fact that he could only whimper.
Somewhere on the edge of his mind sounds and colors were moving. The sound of bare hips hitting each other with great speed. Gold flashes under his eyelids. Severus' jerky whisper:
''Do you like that, Potter? You love to be fucked in this way. You love to be punished, even if some part of you hates it.''
He could only answer with a moan. Harry's cheek rubbed against the material while Snape pressed his head to the seat, as if to prevent Harry from defending himself or trying to break free and escape.
But he had no intention to do so.
''I asked you a question, Potter!'' Snape's voice broke through the heat of vapor enveloping him. ''Tell me, how much do you like it?''
How could he answer him when he was unable to even think coherently? How could he find his voice in the midst of groans and whining constantly escaping his mouth? How could he express with words the huge storm that raged in his body?
''I-I-loo-ve it,'' he moaned at last, clenching his eyes as Severus changed direction and entered him a little more deeply. Warm testicles struck his naked buttocks.
''Go on,'' the man hissed. Harry felt urging impatience in Snape’s voice . ''I want to hear how you like it, how much you love it even if you continue to try to repress it.''
''I loo-ve it wh-en you-u enter me-e-e... ''
Snape hit his prostate again, depriving him of speech. Oh yes, he loved it! He would do anything to get it, to feel this aggressive desire, this animal brutality. So he could only whimper and explode in a thousand sparks - he could only squirm, jerk, scream 'more!', 'harder!', 'deeper!', because in moments like these, he forgot about the war, about destiny, about everything that awaited him; he felt as if he were completely free, as if he weren't
Harry Potter but a groan vibrating from pleasure, someone who existed with only one goal: to feel.
He provoked Snape because he wanted to get it; he played with danger, teetering on a thin line. Now he understood it. He had always wanted Severus to be nicer, but when he did, Harry had a chance to discover something that had always been buried deep inside him...
...that he didn’t want him to be like that. Always, from the very beginning, he'd been getting exactly what he desired most. Memories echoed in his head. When did it start? Yes, he remembered... all those embarrassing thoughts he had pushed further and further away. But they were always there, waiting for the right moment to reveal themselves. Now, he remembered... he remembered the incredible excitement he'd felt when Snape was fucking him just before the bashing. He remembered how he'd felt when the man humiliated him, he recalled that one ineffable thought which he ignored, too scared... And later, when Severus had pressed him against the wall in the cupboard and whispered his threat... the way it instantly made him hard. Oh, he remembered this feeling of coercion. He liked how Snape's harsh words had kindled a fire inside him, making him completely forget about his shame. And today, when Severus had laid cards on the table before him, when he'd told him directly what Harry was hiding deep in his heart... he finally understood. Nothing could be hidden from Snape, and damn it, he'd figured him out again! And he was right. Harry loved the feeling of humiliation. Did it make him abnormal? It was quite possible. But in a perverted way, they fit together. After all, Snape loved to have complete control over him, he loved when Harry obeyed him, loved to inflict pain and to see how Harry was asking for more. Severus was giving him what he wanted, and Harry was taking it greedily. He remembered how his second, darker side had provoked Snape at the lesson, how he'd seen the rage in the man's eyes, but had no intention to put out that fire. He really wanted the bomb to explode, because he loved the feeling of expectation, this uncertainty, considering punishment awaiting him for damage he'd caused. It couldn't be compared with anything else, and Harry knew that he could no longer live without that risk. And that he would take that risk again and again...
Yes, he was definitely abnormal.
He didn't know when his eyes filled with tears. Snape was right. That's why the Potion had pointed at him. Because he was the only one able to give him what he needed.
''You're a dirty little whore, Potter.''
A huge wave swept through his body. He felt as though the boiling oil was pouring down his skin instead of sweat.
A long moan escaped Harry. His tears soaked into the chair’s material.
''I am... ''
He couldn't fight it.
''...a dirty... ''
It was his end.
'' ...little... ''
He hit rock bottom.
A loud, wild groan was Severus' response. The man bent over him, thrusting with even greater force, and murmured in his ear:
Harry felt another eruption of painful pleasure, more powerful than all the previous ones.
Oh, it was so great! He could be anyone now for Severus to fuck him like that forever.
''Yes, fu-uck... ye-es! That's it! Fuck m-me! You know... how-w I love it! Oh, damn! Seve-erus...'' the words themselves began to emerge from his mouth, as if some door leading to the darkest and dirtiest things in his mind had opened. ''Harder... oh yes! I want you to fu-uck m-me... to be in-n m-me... oooooh... forever! I'll do-o everyt-thing, j-just d-don't stop!''
He felt Severus slow down, being fascinated by this show. But a moment later he increased his movements again, though with a new verve, with even greater force, as if to satisfy Harry's desires.
The boy pressed his face into the seat, moaning into it hoarsely. He was no longer able to speak. He'd turned into desire itself - pure and blinding.
Snape pushed in him, almost lying on his back. The edge of the arm of the chair was pressing against his stomach, but this only strengthened the sensations. A few more thrusts, a few heavy breaths just above his head, a few hot flushes and...
...All dissolved in a purple haze. Harry wanted to just drown in pleasure, and never emerge on the surface again. Hot wave flooded every nook and cranny of his body, trembling uncontrollably, reaching everywhere and devouring everything that stood in its way, including consciousness and senses.
Hot tears flowed from his eyes, his breath stuck in his throat, and his muscles cramped painfully. He wanted to scream, to jerk and to squirm, but the orgasm was too strong, and Harry was unable to control his body. His opened mouth pressed against the seat was silent, while his body quivered like a fiddle string, ready to break off under Severus' fingers.
Only when the pleasure released him from its clutches, he could moan and rapidly pull the air into his sore lungs. He fell limply into the chair, unable to shift even a finger. The muscles turned into water and his mind was too immersed in intoxication to try forcing his body to perform any movement. He could only lie there, drifting among the flowing waves of pleasure.
After a moment he felt Severus catch him by the arm, forcefully raising him from the chair. Harry groaned unhappily, because he was too weak to stand on his own. Snape pulled him closer, turning Harry so he would face him, but Harry's legs buckled and he dropped to his knees. Purple spots danced before his eyes, but they vanished immediately as he saw a flared cock aimed at his face. Understanding struck him violently, and he quickly looked up at Snape's face. He saw it! Mouth half-opened in a silent scream, eyes clenched shut, face full of heavenly intoxication, extremely gentle... Severus looked so... beautiful. Harry's eyes began to glisten with delight. It was simply the most wonderful sight he had ever had the chance to see. He felt warm cum spurts on his face, closed his eyes and smiled, reveling in its scent. He opened his mouth, wanting to taste it. He'd missed it so much. That was the essence of Severus. An essence, which only he - Harry - could try. He heard a prolonged moan of pleasure above him. A groan that vibrated around him, carrying everything that man would have never expressed with words.
After a moment there was silence, broken only by the peaceful sounds of their accelerated breathing. Harry hesitantly opened his eyes and looked up again. On his glasses there were gleaming white droplets. He met the dark eyes, pupils burning, reflecting the gleams of the recent all consuming fire. His heart leaped in his chest. Severus leaned over and gently rubbed a drop of his sperm from the boy's cheek. Harry grimaced and hissed, feeling a sudden pain.
Snape frowned, as if remembering only now the wound he had inflicted. He saw Snape straighten up and pull out his wand. He touched his cheek with it and whispered:
Harry felt a strange burning sensation, as if his skin healed over, and the wound closed. Snape couldn't leave any traces. He already opened his mouth to thank him, but then Severus touched his cheek again and Harry hissed again. He looked at the man with surprise, and Snape smiled wryly:
''I masked the trace, but the pain will remain, so you'll remember today's lesson well, Potter. But after all, you like pain... ''
Harry widened his eyes.
I see that you like pain...
These words echoed in his mind - he had heard them somewhere, but now he
couldn't remember where and when.
I'm going to cause you a lot of pain...
He blinked several times, pushing the strange feeling aside, along with the words that had crept into his mind.
Severus stood up and looked at him.
''Get up and dress,'' he said dryly, then turned and disappeared in his bedroom.
Harry felt a familiar twinge in his heart.
He already missed him so much.
Harry was lying in bed, staring at the ceiling, and thousands of thoughts were circling in his head. What he had discovered today, what he had learned about himself... His cheeks burned fiercely when he remembered everything he'd said during sex. Right away he wanted to hide his reddened face in the pillow. But it didn't mean anything... it had just been his mind dissolved in pleasure saying many stupid things.
He rolled onto his stomach and put his hands around the pillow, remembering the promises he'd given. Snape was a vile bastard! He knew how to break him! He knew what spot to hit so that Harry'd become a puppet in his hands.
Always, when it was over, the boy was angry with himself - angry that once again he had allowed this, but when Severus approached him, when he felt his breath on his neck... principles always became a distant memory, promises dispelled like a mist, his legs bent under him and the only thing remained was desire which had to be fulfilled. It was his weakness, and Snape knew it very well. And that's why Harry always lost.
No, enough of that! He would no longer think about it, because he was only getting more and more mad with himself! Maybe in the morning he'd be able to look at it from a different perspective... and it would all make sense. For now, he was too scared.
He had to focus on something else! He remembered his friends who had surrounded him in a tight circle when he returned from detention, and began to watch him carefully to see if he was whole and healthy, and if Snape hadn't broken a bone or something. He’d wanted to get rid of them quickly, close himself in the bedroom and plunge in his own thoughts, but he'd had to stay to help Ginny to go unnoticed to the girls' dormitory. It wasn't difficult; because in the Common Room there was such a clamor that even Hagrid could have passed unnoticed. And for the whole time everyone had been admiring his courage. He was no longer ''coward and traitor'' to them. He didn't think it had ended like that, but now, taking a detached view, he concluded that it was worth it.
Harry rolled onto another side, reached under the pillow and pulled his green jewel out. He looked at the slightly hazy light spinning inside the stone. He recalled Severus' face absorbed in the orgasm, and a warm smile appeared on his lips. He closed his eyes and sent a message:
Good night, Severus.
You let me violate you
You let me desecrate you
You let me penetrate you
You let me complicate you
I want to fuck you like an animal
I want to feel you from the inside
I want to fuck you like an animal
My whole existence is flawed**
* "Dangerous Mind" by Within Temptation
** "Closer" by Nine Inch Nails
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